Love and Relations

 LOVE usually refers to an experience one person feels for another.Love often involves caring for,or identifying with a person or thing including oneself. A person can be said to love an object,principle or goal to which they are deeply committed.

Psychology depicts love as a cognitive and social phenomenon.

Psychologist Robert Sternberg formulated a triangular theory of LOVE and argued that love has three different components: Intimacy,Commitment and Passion Intimacyis a form in which two people share confidences and various details of their personal lives, and is usually shown in friendships and romantic love affairs.Commitment on the other hand is the expectation that the relationship is permanent, and the last form of love is sexual attraction and passion.Passionate love is shown in infatuation as well as romantic love. All forms of love are viewed as varying combinations of these three components. Non-love does not include any of these components. Liking only includes intimacy. Infatuated love only includes passion. Empty love only includes commitment. Romantic love includes both intimacy and passion. Companionate love includes intimacy and commitment. Fatuous love includes passion and commitment. Lastly, consummate love includes all three components.

American psychologist Zick Rubin sought to define love by psychometrics in the 1970s. His work states that three factors constitute love: attachment, caring, and intimacy.

Psychologist Erich Fromm maintained in his book The Art of Loving that love is not merely a feeling but is also actions, and that in fact, the "feeling" of love is superficial in comparison to one's commitment to love via a series of loving actions over time. In this sense, Fromm held that love is ultimately not a feeling at all, but rather is a commitment to, and adherence to, loving actions towards another, oneself, or many others, over a sustained duration. Fromm also described love as a conscious choice that in its early stages might originate as an involuntary feeling, but which then later no longer depends on those feelings, but rather depends only on conscious commitment.

Certainly love is influenced by hormones (such as oxytocin), neurotrophins (such as NGF), and pheromones, and how people think and behave in love is influenced by their conceptions of love. The conventional view in biology is that there are two major drives in love: sexual attraction and attachment. Attachment between adults is presumed to work on the same principles that lead an infant to become attached to its mother. The traditional psychological view sees love as being a combination of companionate love and passionate love. Passionate love is intense longing, and is often accompanied by physiological arousal (shortness of breath, rapid heart rate); companionate love is affection and a feeling of intimacy not accompanied by physiological arousal.

In her book, Why We Love: The Nature and Chemistry of Romantic Love, Helen Fischer --- an American Anthropologist,human behavior researcher,and leading Expert on biology of love and attraction.She proposed that humanity has evolved three core brain systems for mating and reproduction:

1. lust - the sex drive or libido, also described as borogodó.

2. attraction - early stage intense romantic love.

3. attachment - deep feelings of union with a long term partner.

Love can start with any of these three feelings, Fisher maintains. Some people have sex with someone new and then fall in love. Some fall in love first, then have sex. Some feel a deep feeling of attachment to another, which then turns into romance and the sex drive. But the sex drive evolved to initiate mating with a range of partners; romantic love evolved to focus one's mating energy on one partner at a time; and attachment evolved to enable us to form a pair bond and rear young together as a team.

Fisher discusses many of the feelings of intense romantic love, saying it begins as the beloved takes on "special meaning." Then you focus intensely on him or her. People can list the things they dislike about a sweetheart, but they sweep these things aside and focus on what they adore.



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